Our Humans

Meet the humans who reside in the house of gladys & ethel’s porch….

The Girl

The Girl is the one responsible for placing Gladys and Ethel on the porch, though she seems largely unaware of the responsibility she has taken on.

She comes and goes throughout the day, often carrying packages, books, or coffee, and appears to believe she is in charge of the house. She frequently rearranges porch décor without proper notice and has been known to move the geese seasonally.

She prefers reading over football, which Gladys considers a concerning trait.

While she does not actively participate in porch discussions, she remains central to many of the events observed on Magnolia Lane.

Porch Status: Under observation, but showing potential..
Porch Opinion:

  • Gladys: “Well-meaning, but misguided.”
  • Ethel: “Unaware of how much we see.”
The Girl
M
The Geese

M

M is a steady and dependable presence on Magnolia Lane.

She understands the importance of routine, respects the rhythm of the household, and, most importantly, appreciates football. She is known to provide snacks, maintain order, and move through the day with purpose.

Her actions are predictable, her habits consistent, and her presence generally reassuring.

M does not engage in unnecessary activity and has never given the porch a reason for concern.

Porch Status: Approved
Porch Opinion:

  • Gladys: “Finally, someone with sense.”
  • Ethel: “Reliable.”


R

R is a quiet and generally agreeable presence.

He comes and goes without much disruption, acknowledges the porch appropriately, and maintains acceptable behavior standards. While his schedule is not always predictable, his actions have not raised concern.

He does not involve himself in porch matters, which is both noted and appreciated.

Porch Status: Approved
Porch Opinion:

  • Gladys: “Good manners.”
  • Ethel: “Acceptable.”


R

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